Psychoticly Fun I would like to draw your attention to a game that is outstanding. Psychonauts. There is no finer game that has come out for Xbox, PS2, or PC this year, and roughly 17 people worldwide have picked this bad boy up. This makes Goggle Bob cry. And when Goggle Bob cries, you get crazy “reviews” that are desperate pleas for you to purchase a game. We don’t need another Beyond Good & Evil! Psychonauts is the story of a circus boy who decides to run away from the circus to join a summer camp for psychic warriors. Do you see how the very basis of the game is one degree away from Big Top Pee-wee? Are you not excited? If you are not, can you actually consider yourself a human being? Anyway, our little hero, Raz, joins mentioned summer camp and goes on a whirlwind adventure through various oddly shaped humans’ brains. And yes, creatures that look like this... ...are meant to be human. Must be an offshoot of the Doug universe. And speaking of weird characters, every damn organism in this game is brimming with personality. I just can’t remember any of their names. But there’s a bear obsessed Russian student, a pair of sycophantic gossip girls, a small blue child that has a head explodey problem, and a duo of completely suicidal cheerleaders, (“Why did you jump off of the roof?” “Because the poison didn’t work.”) and those are only the completely unnecessary NPC’s. The actual main characters are pieces of work. Coach Oleander, a diminutive despot with a major napoleon complex and even more daddy issues, is a major player in Raz’s adventure, and every second Coach is on screen is amazing. Never thought a small, pear shaped man who occasionally wears spandex could dominate a scene, but, he (or a host of programmers and Nick Jameson) pulls it off with gusto. There’s also a giant hulking lung fish, the most sadistic turtle the world has ever seen, and pyrotechnic cougars, just incase you thought there wasn’t a wide variety of critters to compliment the humans. Enough about the basic scripting, this isn’t a novel, it’s a video game. Psychonauts plays like the illegitimate bastard child of Mario 64 and an adventure game such as Monkey Island or King’s Quest. There’s plenty of running, jumping, punching, and even the occasional Prince of Persia: Sands of Time-esque climbing and swinging. But as action oriented as the game is, there’s still plenty of those adventure “puzzles” that involve finding the right item and using it in the right place. They’re mostly simple puzzles, and there’s basically a “help me” command which will solve most any problem for the player, but it’s still nice to see a game where hitting the jump button at the right time isn’t the only key to victory (*cough* Sands of Time *cough*). Whereas there is a lot to do at the camp (the “real world” for Raz) the meat of the adventure occurs upon the meat of the brain. Raz enters nine different brain worlds, (though technically only 8 different brains) each with their own styles and difficulties. Coach Oleander’s war torn brainscape is a sharp contrast to the clean, organized “braincube” of Agent Nein. In later stages things get even more interesting as you encounter a psychoward full of crazies, each with an immense brain (surface area, at least). Fred Bonaparte faces his ancestor Napoleon on a giant board game in his imagination, while Edgar the Painter’s unconscious world is a Spanish pueblo rendered under a black light, teeming with luchadores. And each brain world has its own problems, whether they be jumping exercises, shooting gallery gimmicks, or organizing horrible actors into a play that will wow the critics. There’s definitely no lack of originality in every world of Psychonauts. The poor, under purchased game isn’t without its flaws, though. The camera, like in most 3-D action games, has its troubles, occasionally refusing to show Raz in favor giving a spectacular view of the inside of a tree. And if the camera doesn’t catch up to you fast enough in a few areas, you’ll find Raz mysteriously sliding off the “slope” of something perfectly level. Psychonauts has also come down with a bad case of Donkey Kong Country syndrome, with about 30,000 different little things to collect per area per level. There are figments, challenge markers, challenge cards, scavenger hunt treasures, emotional baggage, brains, memory vaults, arrowheads, mental arrowheads, deep arrowheads, mental cobwebs, astral layers, golden helmets, golden balls of hate, and golden question marks. By the end of just one area you may have found over 70 little knickknacks, with your only reward for such being the promise of an actually useful reward after another 430 doodads. There’s a slight economy problem, too. After approximately the second level, it’s quite easy to purchase everything that you’d ever need, yet you continue to be rewarded with currency (psychic arrowheads) long after you’ve bought out the local store multiple times. It would certainly be nice to be able to buy some upgrades, costumes, or just something with the zillions you’ve earned by the grand finale. Flaws aside, this game actually is quite awe-inspiring, because of the little things. The writing is always funny, which is a rarity in today’s games (though it is amusing that the PS2 version of Psychonauts was released the same week as another humorous, though not as clever, game, Destroy All Humans!). Boyd, a paranoid schizophrenic borderline pyromaniac, has a brain swarming with secret agents claiming to be everything from construction workers to grieving widows. You haven’t lived until you’ve heard a secret agent’s deadpan mourning for “her” dearly departed husband and wondering whether or not to cash his 401k plan. You had to be there. A previously mentioned collectable, the memory vaults, are filled with wonderful hand drawn art of each “brain character”’s torrid memories. The art is wonderful, and a great contrast between the “real world” 3-D of the actual game. Memories should be black and white and 2-D any day of the week. And speaking of memories, each of the main characters also have fully realized pasts that influence their brainscapes (albeit, in a very ham-visited, psychoanalytical way). Surprising amount of tragedy for these guys in a game known for its comedy. Final Fantasy could learn a thing or two here about having likeable heroes, villains, and bit characters with “real” motivations. Sephiroth looks like a faintly disturbed (bishounen) goth compared to Boyd. And there’s an entire cinema scene devoted to Mr. Pokeylope and Linda. In short, Psychonauts is a wonderful game, and the most fun I’ve had with a controller all year. It’s not the next Zelda or GTA, but it’s definitely the next Grim Fandango or Neverhood... and should become about as obscure. Go on, get in on the ground floor, own it before all the cool kids decide to like it. Do it for your mental health. Final Rating: The complete brains of a human, baboon, monkey, camel, kangaroo, cat, raccoon, and squirrel, plus ten percent of a poor little bunny’s brain. Follow the white rabbit back to Game'in

All non-copyrighted material is copyright 2005 Robert Pollack. Reproduction of most anything without Robert's express permission in whole or in part is prohibited by law. Ain't that a kick in the pants?